Adam's Despicable Birthday Party

Adam celebrated his 5th birthday barely 2 weeks after Alpha's Lemonade Party. We weren't planning on throwing a party for him. All we had in mind was a simple dinner with family. But that got chucked out the window pretty fast. With Adam being Adam, we don't get a lot of party invitations or play dates. He's a really sweet guy, and deep down he is like any other boy who likes boy stuff, like blowing birthday cakes, pinatas, and some spaghetti and ice cream. Parties are usually tricky to pull off, since he might end up being overstimulated and not enjoy it at all. So we decided on a small party in school, pretty low key, and we built the theme around something he really really likes.  The little dumpling loves the banana song, he sings it to himself all the time, and would sometimes ask me to mock-punch him during the final BANANAAAA part so he could throw himself over a pile of pillows. There even was a time when he sang the banana song in his sleep. So I locked down on a Minion-themed party. (Okay, he likes dinosaurs too, and numbers, but I was looking forward to dressing my kiddos down as Gru and Agnes, so we, and by "we" I mean "I" decided on a minion party).

Minion Hats

Cookie robots

  These aren't cookie robots like the ones I saw here but they'll do!

Minion Tools

 This is probably the only thing I bought (other than the food) for the party. They are actually pencils with erasers shaped like carpentry tools. I bought them from Divisoria for 100php/dozen. Not bad at all.

Gru

Agnes

Gru's scarf and Agnes' tutu were the only two things I made. The rest of their outfit were already in their closets. Please ignore the loose strands of thread. I did say I only had 10 days to prepare, right? :D

Minion Cake

I don't bake! So I bought this cake, really cheapo. Another benefit of sidelining as a party coordinator. This was a hit! The little dumpling didn't let anyone touch the cake for 2 days! All he'd let us have is the blue icing around the edges. I guess he liked it, huh!

Minion Pinata

This is a really bad Iphone pic taken during nighttime. I followed this tutorial. It's not as pretty, but it'll do!

There were a lot of grinning, happy minions.

Add caption

Gru ate his food all on his own. No help. No leftovers. No flailing arms and sprints around the room in between bites. He just ate like a real boy. :D

 We suck at family pictures. 

We sang birthday songs...

 ... gave presents...

 

 .. took more pictures

... and ate some more! The party was a success! What I love about this party is that I didn't have to clean up afterwards! Yipee! The kids were a riot. Adam was happy. It's one of those rare days when we just felt like we kicked Autism's butt. Everybody couldn't help smiling. Seriously, those kids are really really sweet. They are the best. I love how they couldn't care less if Adam is different. No eye-rolling, no pitiful glances, Not even the look of contained aversion. I am glad that my dumpling is surrounded by these little bright lights.

Thank you for coming to my Despicable Birthday Party!

Alpha's Sunny Lemonade Party

This happened ages ago (okay, a few months). We finally had our little riceball baptized. I can't tell you how much I love parties. I LOooooooove parties. Never liked spending for it though. haha. When you have your first baby, it's soooo easy to rationalize spending excessively. That's what I did with Adam. But now that we have Alpha, and Adam is already in school... Even if we want to throw big parties like we used to with Adam, we just can't justify splurging so much.  It sucks being kid#2. :(  I still wanted to give her a kickass party tho. To keep everything within our budget, I DIY'd a lot of things and extracted every ounce of creative juice inside my body. I think it turned out pretty nicely.

We didn't spend double digits to make this party happen. We totally got a great deal when we got the venue booked (Under 5k with tables and chairs + linens + chafing dishes + plates etc. + free coffee, water, and ice! How can you beat that?).  We found a secret pocket in Marikina (Marikina Heights, near SSAM) that has a beautiful garden set up. It is a retreat house for a Christian Group (I couldn't remember what group for the life of me.). They rent the place out to raise funds for their scholars. The place itself has a beautiful, serene vibe. I started brainstorming about what could be a good theme that would match their beautiful gardens. I figured a morning brunch is appropriate. Breakfast fare would not only be cheaper, it would be easier to prepare as well! And since this would be the beginning of Alpha's life as a Christian, why not do the event at the beginning of the day? My theme was revolving around the color schemes yellow+white, and so I thought of doing a sunny lemonade party. I googled for some inspiration, and used pinterest to pin some of my favorite ideas.  Here are photos and details of our reception. And here's the link to my pinterest inspiration board.

THE CANDY BAR

It doubles as "Thank You" souvenirs. My brother-in-law flew in from the States and he gifted us with extra candies that we added to our other Divi candy finds. Guests can put their candies in paper bags and close it off with a simple paper clip tied with yellow ribbons. We placed our candies in upcycled jars decorated with the cheapest lace I could find (4php per yard) and more ribbons. The signature frame is a gift from one of my good friends Mindy of Theme Park Inc.. She also helped in dressing up the place and generously loaned party linens and decors from her stash. Thanks Mindy!

WISHES FOR ALPHA

Totally knocked this idea off Pinterest. To save money, I did the layout using Photoshop. It's not as scary as I thought it would be! And it turned out pretty cute I think. Guests can hang their "wishes" to a "wishing tree". It's actually a bunch of branches on a vase. Those branches were literally plucked from the sidewalk by my friend Mindy. I bought the cheapest cardstock and had them printed at UP Arcade to save even more money. Total cost: 240 pesos!

THE BACKDROP

ALPHA letters made by Mindy. Curtains are plain white sheer curtains from Mindy's house. :D We hung them from a low branch, added pinwheels (another pinterest idea), and voila! Instant focal point.

THE CENTERPIECE

I decorated wine bottles with more lace and ribbon, then added tissue paper flowers in pink, yellow, and white! Tutorial for paper flowers here. Making all those flowers were time consuming, but it really added a lot of charm to the whole setup.

THE BUFFET

 We served no fuss breakfast buffet during the reception. I didn't want to be a kitchen slave so everything on the menu was easy, one-step meals. Bacon, hotdogs, longganisa Alaminos, tapa, and tocino. I saved a ton of money by not buying in groceries but in Marikina Market. Lemonade (of course) was served as refreshments. We also had lemon cucumber water available. The venue brewed some kapeng barako as well. I couldn't find photos for the life of me! All in all, food costs did not exceed 2,000pesos. Crazy, huh!

ROSETTE CAKE AND ROSETTE CUPCAKES

Rosette cupcakes were gifted by a generous ninang. I forgot how much the rosette cake costs, but it is definitely not more than 1,000pesos. It's lemon sponge cake with lemon curd. Yum.

THE DRESS

I saved a lot of money by making Alpha's baptismal dress. I knew I couldn't afford buying her one that isn't tacky and cheap. I conquered most of my sewing fears by making this dress. I could have done a lot of things better, but all in all I am happy with the outcome. I also made a matching diaper cover and bonnet. You could say our little riceball was all wrapped up in her mother's love. 

So that's Alpha's Lemonade Party. I didn't have a ginormous budget to begin with, but I poured in a lot of love in making her little party. I am also lucky to have super talented friends. They're crazy talented and super nice, sometimes I wonder why they're even friends with good 'ol me! 

What? You want more pictures?

Adam's wish for  Alpha. He said these were hearts, and then he "checked" his paper afterwards, hence the horizantal lines. haha. 

I look sooo weird in this photo but Mindy is so cute in it I just had to post. thanks MIndy!

Thank you for coming to my party!

Autism Talk: Making Halloween a Positive Experience for my KId on the Spectrum

Since I became a mom, Halloween has become one of my favorite holidays. I love dressing up my little dumpling in costumes and stretching my creativity to make a costume that is not only unique, but captures my kid's personality and interest as well.

For his first Halloween Party, I had him dressed up as a cowboy. The little dumpling was 14 months. He had a Cowboy Party for his first birthday, and I just recycled that look so he can go for Halloween.

Couldn't find the Halloween photo. This picture was from his Cowboy Party.

The top and vest were custom made for him. He had his regular pants on with snaps on the crotch for easy nappy access. The straw hat was a divisoria find. It's just a regular hat that I pimped a little to make it look more cowboy-ish. I sewed in a silk necktie underneath so that the straw won't scratch him. I also added elastic straps that go under his chin to make sure it won't fall off. Back then we didn't know about his autism. The thing we considered the most about picking a costume for him is comfort. 

However, since finding out about his ASD, it sort of upped the challenge of making Halloween an enjoyable event for my son. These kinds of parties is a surefire recipe for a sensory overload for kids like Adam -- costumes, scary faces, too many strangers, loud noises. It seems an impossible task to get through the day without fits or tantrums. Case in point.

Halloween 2009

You could barely see it from the mirror's reflection but a baby dressed as a tiyanak walked in. Minutes before that, a Kampanerong Kuba walked by. Halloween wasn't enjoyable at all. He was too heavy for me to carry all day. He was cranky and crying. He was weary from the scratchy fabric of this ridiculously overpriced vampire costume. He kept tripping on his cape. He choked and toggled at the ties around his neck. What's more, a whole army of vampires were wearing the exact same costume! AGGGHH! At this time he just turned 2, we were starting to notice that he is not developing any new words or language skills like most kids his age, but apart from doing our own research regarding normal developmental behaviour, we didn't take any steps to figuring it out until about 4 months later.

When we found our about Adam's ASD, and following the tantrum incident he had last year, we were really considering if we'd let him join next year's Halloween Party. At this time, we've already been consulting with our developmental pediatrician. The little dumpling was also enrolled in a preschool that caters to SPED and non-SPED kids. He has also been seeing a speech therapist regularly for a couple of months. 

I took the time to plan everything to make sure that Adam will tolerate and maybe even enjoy Halloween. I went with a costume that is comfortable and loose-fitting, so that it would be the least of his worries. Scrub suits! It's pretty much like his pajamas. I shod him in socks and crocs and an OR cap, made him a "medic" bag, and my little surgeon is ready for trick or treat!

Halloween 2010

The morning after. Happy kid

That Halloween had its share of bumps and "bites" and "kicks". A lot of moms rolled their eyes at me, I get it. It's okay. It was still a yay moment for me. We got through it. Adam had a lot of fun. We got a lot of candy. My dumpling even won 2nd Best in Costume! Double Yay! 

Since then I've learned to listen and open my eyes more to the things that he likes, the things that put a smile to his face, and to tap into them just to make sure that he enjoys his costumes and parties. He is sooo not good in using words to express himself. He is also not good at big parties or loud places. But in all essence, he is still a kid and I want him to experience life and what being a kid is like. Even if it means volunteering myself as the "DANCING MOMMY" during BRING ME games just so he could also get a prize, I'm all for it. I just love him. 

11 years ago, my big brother went to heaven

11 years ago, my big brother went to heaven. He was 19. I was a year younger. 

Grief strikes you and throws your whole life in the air haphazardly. Time will eventually dull the pain. Soon, pieces of your life slowly settle back to where it once was. But a little nudge, a little inconspicuous moment you would not have seen coming from miles and miles away, is all it takes to let all the pain back in.

One nudge, and I am 18 again, holding as much of his hand as I can without tripping the tubes coming out of it.  And then I'm back in highschool, delivering love letters for him. And then I am six, sharing ice cream, playing with lego blocks, playing in the rain, poking termite hills with sticks, filling our bellies with soda. Mom trouble. Class cards trouble. Girl trouble. I remember everything. All the petty fights, who uses the phone first, and why am I always the last to play with the Nintendo?  

My Kuya Nikos in the middle, his hand is over my shoulder. My younger brother is on the right.

Kuya, you once pushed me on the bike. On purpose. I got a huge scar on my knee for it. That was 20 years ago. The scar is still there, but looking at it, I am reminded just how long it really has been, and just how much I really miss you. 

I am sad. I feel robbed of the million other memories I should be having with you. Robbed of the present and the future we could have together. My dumplings will never learn how much your singing voice sucks. I'll never get to laugh at you when baldness starts claiming your pristine hairline. I feel cheated.

"She held her grief behind her eyes like an ocean & when she leaned forward into the day it spilled onto the floor & she wiped at it quickly with her foot & pretended no one had seen." - source here

It's been 11 years. This time, the "nudge" came from a broken china. The one you knocked over with a ball that we had to put together. Our mother's face when she came home was the maddest I've ever seen. But then after you left us, that sloppily-smeared epoxy over the cracks of that broken china fill us with nostalgia when things were still simple. It's broken again, hence the meltdown. I guess even the strongest glue eventually bows its head to time and weathering.  I had it pulled out from the garbage so i can try to piece it back together. I'll use a stronger epoxy this time.

Pre-school and rainy days

So the dumpling started preschool. I've been chewing on my nails in panicky anxiety waiting for that dreaded first day.  I've been snowballing so much worry about the little dumpling in his new school that I am just relieved that day has come and gone. We're still standing. Nothing much has changed. And boy am I grateful. The fact that nothing has changed means that he's not regressing. We're still on the same page. I'd take that as a victory.

He waits for his turn on the slide. He looks at me in confident triumph when he conquers a new playground equipment.  Although he needs his yaya to stay inside the classroom with him, he participates and does his schoolwork on his own. Just last week, during recess, he asked his classmate for a hotdog. What? No prompts? It just seems so overly simplistic, but for me, that's a milestone. We might be starting on a snail's pace here, but I know we'll get there. In my heart of hearts I believe that this little dumpling can do anything. Be anything. There's not a grain of doubt in my mind about that.

Just this morning, he kept prying the door so he could "go rain" (TRANSLATE: he wants to go outside and play in the rain). My reprimands were only delaying the inevitable. To have some sense of control over this whole rain playing thing, I made him wear his raincoat. (he didn't object.. which is a win because he didn't like the feel of the raincoat on his skin. I was seriously considering giving it away since I didn't think he was going to use it.) The next 15 minutes after that was pure magic. We jumped on rain puddles (he won't take no for an answer, momma has to jump too), counted flowers, threw pebbles, acted silly. He lifted his gaze to sky and closed his eyes as he let the rain drops patter on his tiny cheeks. I am lucky to have my cameraphone just at that moment to capture that one moment of pure bliss.

Dear Adam,

The only way to love you is to love all of you. ALL.OF.YOU. You are unique. As is each of us. And one day you'll see that the world will open up for you and embrace you the way I have embraced your whole being. I love you.



Peace, love, and drooly kisses,

Golde